Coming together as a couple after war deployment isn’t always easy or something that happens naturally. It requires effort, and an understanding that each person has grown and changed during the separation. A positive way to think about this is that both of you, service person and spouse, have developed your own sense of purpose coping with new experiences while apart. What’s important now is to come together and create a “shared sense of purpose”, that is essential for your well being as a couple, that of your children and your life in the community. This won’t happen overnight; it will take time, mutual compassion and a desire to do so. Here are four steps to help you create a “shared sense of purpose”.